Bust My Bubble

First of all, I am not posting for the sake of complaining. It's more like I'm shaking my head, sighing...
Today, I saw the surgeon for Port Chop's follow-up. Other than a stitch that popped through the skin, it looked fine. I told him the nurses have complained a lot about the port, to which he said Nurses complain about everything. Aargh. I also told him about the intermittent bulging of the veins in my hand and heaviness in my arm, he didn't know about that either. So, I wondered why I even sat there for an hour waiting on him to tell me everything is fine. So then I walked down the hall to schedule my mammogram. There was a communication gap, the secretary thought I wanted it today. Yeah, I'm going to walk in off the street and demand an immediate boob-smashing. Oh, and they said NO to the ultrasound, looks like it will be done the regular ole' way. The secretary said, without even knowing where Port Chop lives, Oh it won't be in the way. THEN she got huffy b/c she wanted me to come next Wednesday and I said Can't do that, I'll be hooked up to the chemo pump. More aaargh. Ok, I'm done venting.
I did think of more ways cancer changes things, I'll pick up where I left off.
6. I can completely rationalize my shopping trips. As in, Sure I can buy that bag of chocolate, I DESERVE it... I really really need that pair of pants to help me get through chemo...I'll be SO comfortable in that outfit...it goes on and on.
7. The kids yell "MOM, CANCER!!!" every time they hear the word cancer on tv.
8. You start to play the mental cancer card game. As in, HEY...You can't cut me off in traffic, I have cancer!!!
9. Hair falling out, brown patches on the skin, lips cracked, and chemo bag strapped on, People will always say "Well, you look good".

I have gotten some of the nicest gifts this week. I got a prayer shawl yesterday from the ladies of Maple United Methodist Church. They put it on the altar and prayed over it and prayed for me. It is beautiful. I'm getting my hair cut Friday, so I'll post a pic of me with the shawl. I love wearing it. My Aunt Wanda made me another hat and a scarf hat, which is really great. Last night, I went to see a little boy for speech. His family is so nice and they have always been grateful for how I have helped him. The mom gave me a gift. I opened it and it was a Willow Tree. She said It's the Healing Angel. I thought, How sweet, she thinks I am healing her son. Then I realized OH, it's for my own healing. Now, that was a classic foggy moment.

Gotta go. Emily needs me. Her new phrase is "I hate to bust your bubble". She says it anytime she wants something.
Keep in touch.
Love,
Michele;