Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Manhole covers and recliners

Let me start by saying I have been really lucky so far that the chemo has not greatly affected me. So, please don't think I have forgotten to count my blessings. Having said that, I can now tell you it has been a not-so-good day for me- and it's only noon.
I have been so emotional today. I went to work and hit a 1-2 on the tear scale between each home visit. While sitting in one house, my stomach is telling me the dreaded gastro side effect is coming. I panic and leave, but so far it hasn't hit. Anyway, I had to go to OptionCare to get Percy unhooked. I pull up in the parking lot and immediately hit a 7. Even though I wanted to completely sever the relationship between Port Chop and Percy, I was also scared. After 10 minutes, I realize I am going to have to go in. So I walk in and of course, I get the stares b/c a 7 on the scale is enough to qualify for Oprah's "ugly cry".
Let me stop right here and tell you something. After spending time in the chemo room at Southeast, and the procedure room at OptionCare, I have discovered a new Theory of Pain, never before discovered. I could qualify for a Nobel prize for this one. Here it is- If a nurse takes you in a room and there is a nice, luxurious, cozy, leather recliner- RUN FOR YOUR LIFE. You are about to be tortured beyond belief...
So, it's time to remove the giant needle. Did I tell you it has a manhole cover over it? Have you ever tried to remove a manhole cover??? It ain't easy. Lots of tugging and pulling. I thought for a minute, maybe this nurse is STANDING on the manhole cover trying to remove it. That's what you call "chair through the wall" moment, when you are pushing so hard against the nice, cozy recliner, you are sure it's going through the wall.
So anyway, I am home now. I wish I could nap but the medicine juices me up. Did I mention the name of this drug. Please don't think this is a joke, or that I'm being obscene but it's called "5FU". Go figure...
Michele

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

5FU?!!? Damn, someone, somewhere has a sick sense of humor. Did you look at the medicine and say, "Back at ya! Thanks for the help, but your bedside manner, sucks!"? Don't be afraid to "cry ugly" - you've earned it. - ABH

Anonymous said...

I am with ABH that someone has a sick sense of humor. My gosh, who has to worry about side effects with the hooking and unhooking of the needle are so tramatic!!! what the heck is the benefit of the Port Chop?!?
I will send out a prayer request regarding the hooking and unhooking of the needle and the bedside manner of the nurses. Mom and I are coming for your next one, but I can tell you now, that there is no way I can be in the room when they hook you up and not pass out if that happens again. Donna

Anonymous said...

I don't care what they say--EMLA cream works great. It makes the hookup much less traumatic. Maybe your oncologist could help you on this one. Speaking from experience the chemo is bad enough and we need any comfort available. JD

Anonymous said...

oh my , your blog is to funny, never in my life did i think i would laugh so hard while reading a blog. the hat is addorable, i have just caught up on your blog, been working a lot, nicu has lots of sick kids. ya, i agree nurses can have a bad bed side manner, use the numbing cream, and if the nurse says you don't need it , remind her she may not but you do. the pig is to funny, whats up pigs to school but no toys????
cob webs for insides are not to bad.
God loans us our children to keep life spicey.
yours is really spicey.
as far as the cry ugly . i yet am to see a person that cries pretty.
if you need someone to go to chemo with you and bat for you with the nurses you call me. you know me i won't mind/
remember everything happens for a reason, why we may never know, yet how we handle it is what matters. you are my new founded hero. my hat is off to you.
you have a special family and if you need more call me/// just kidding.
lots of love,
twylia

Anonymous said...

AS always, your post was great. I don't think I have ever read a blog by someone with such an awesome since of humor, and yours is shining through even through the misery that is cancer.
Although I don't know you, I pray for you every time you come to mind and look forward to your blog posts. As you go through chemo, just remember it's one day closer to being "well!"
Jess in Nebraska

Anonymous said...

Hey,
We're thinking about you and praying for you every day.
Becky W.

Surviving Colorectal Cancer said...

Hi Michelle. I followed your link from the Colon Club site. You have a great sense of humor! You will quickly learn that you great attitude will get you through some rather difficult days. Keep it up!!!

I have also referred to 5FU as something that should not be published. Nice to know I'm not the only sick minded cancer fighter out there!

Thanks for the link. I enjoy your humor and look forward to following your journey.

My prayers are with you and your family.

Anonymous said...

Hi. I'm a 37-year-old Cleveland resident undergoing Folfox chemo for my colon cancer. Spotted your posts on Colon Club. I'm stage 2A so I was lucky we caught mine a bit earlier than yours.

I'm through 9 of my 12 doses so I've learned a few things as I go.

I have no idea what this disc/"manhole cover" is. If your docs aren't using a needle like the one in this link, you might want to request it. It's more like a box and really gives nurses something to grab onto. Honestly, peeling off the tape holding it down hurts worse than the quick sting of pulling this out.

http://www.isips.org/Safety_Huber_Needle.html

- Patrick O'Donnell